and if I left without warning...would it make a difference?

...and I'll be here waiting

I feel I have to withhold my sweetness from you

Because you might crumble it up and toss it away

And since it's a part of me I actually like, I guard it safe

Rihanna - Rude Boy

Come here rude boy boy...

I want to love you but I better not touch (Don't touch)
I want to hold you but my senses tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too much (Too much)
I want to taste you but your lips are venomous poison
You're poison running through my veins
You're poison, I don't want to break these chains

Your mouth, so hot
Your web, I'm caught
Your skin, so wet
Black lace on sweat

I hear you calling and it's needles and pins (And pins)
I want to hurt you just to hear you screaming my name
Don't want to touch you but you're under my skin (Deep in)
I want to kiss you but your lips are venomous poison
You're poison running through my veins
You're poison, I don't wanna break these chains
Poison

    Be all you can be...just never lose yourself

Every time....

...and I bet it was Monday!

Don't ask for Prince charming, he's spoiled, lazy and is used to having things done for him

                                                         Dina Goldstein , Fallen Princesses

I just Love this campaign!

I've said this time and again...I hate being around "used to know" strangers 

a photo of johnny a day

keeps the bad mood away

...I can only agree

Selecção Natural knows how to keep my bad mood away

Damn you heartless barbers...
Ok, so just because a very few percentage of men can pull off the shaved head (Wentworth for example) DOESN'T mean you all can!!
Seriously!! It just kills me when guys with perfect "I wanna touch it!!" hair go and shave it all off!! I mean can you imagine if McDreamy cut off his hair?? It just wouldn't be the same...

The Monkeys rocked as always...Loved it...Yesterday I heard John Mayer's coming to Rock in Rio Lisbon! Perfect!

I heard this song from his new album and if I were to post my feelings it wouldn't come out as right as this...



Young and full of running
Tell me where is that taking me
Just a great figure eight
Or a tiny infinity

Love is really nothing
But a dream that keeps waking me
For all of my trying
We still end up dying
How can it be

Dont say a word
Just come over and lie here with me
Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see

I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe
There I just said it
I'm scared you'll forget about me

So young and full of running
All the way to the edge of desire
Steady my breathing, Silently screaming
I have to have you now

Wired and I'm tired
Think I'll sleep in my clothes on the floor
Maybe this mattress will spin on its axis
And find me on yours

Dont say a word just come over and lie here with me
Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see
I want you bad I'll go back on the things I believe
There I just said it
I'm scared you'll forget about me

Dont say a word just come over and lie here with me
Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see
I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe
There I just said it
I'm scared you'll forget about me

Tomorrow!!!! Arctic Monkeys Live at Campo Pequeno Lisbon!

Cornerstone


From The Ritz To The Rubble

505


Do Me A Favour

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes things fall apart so that better things can fall together."

Marilyn Monroe

These 3 songs I published show my musical schizophrenia

The first gets me...well as it says frantic...the next one gets me absolutly down and melancholic, but I can't stop playing it, and the last gives me energy and because it's so short I have a tendancy to put on replay.

Frantic - Metallica

Breakdown More - Eric Hutchinson

Vampire Weekend - Cousins

"I never felt my Mind repose upon anything with complete and undistracted enjoyment - upon no person but you. When you are in the room my thoughts never flyout of window: you always concentrate my whole senses."

John Keats letters to Fanny Brawne

I've lost some things all throughout last year...but all of a sudden it's all coming back to me.

Now that I've stopped searching for them, they're all just showing up!

So if you took something from me...beware..Karma is in my favor baby!

Joel: I can’t see anything that I don’t like about you.

Clementine: But you will! But you will. You know, you will think of things. And I’ll get bored with you and feel trapped because that’s what happens with me.

Joel: Okay.

Clementine: [pauses] Okay?

Joel: Okay.

The End of the Rainbow...at the end of '09

2009 was great and brought me lots of new experiences and adventures in so many diferent places, lots of laughs and tears, a chapter of my life finished and a new one started.

For all those who were with me along this year thank you! I hope we get to enjoy this one even more...

For those who decided to leave, I wish you luck along your way.

For 2010 I hope for twice the laughter half the tears, triple the L♥ve!

I want to travel, see new places, meet new people!

I gotta feeling that 2010's gonna be a Good year!!

So hot out the box
Can we pick up the pace
Turn it up, heat it up
I need to be entertained
Push the limit, are you with it, baby, don’t be afraid
Imma hurt you real good baby

Let’s go, it’s my show, baby, do what I say
Don’t trip off the glitz that I’m gonna display
I told ya, Imma hold ya down until you’re amazed
Give it to ya til your screamin' my name

No escaping when I start
Once I’m in I own your heart
There’s no way to ring the alarm
So hold on until it’s over

Oh!
Do you know what you got into
Can you handle what I’m ’bout to do
‘Cause it’s about to get rough for you
I’m here For Your Entertainment

Oh!
I bet you thought that I was soft and sweet
You thought an angel swept you off your feet
Well I’m about to turn up the heat
I’m here For Your Entertainment

'Sall right
You’ll be fine
Baby I’m in control
Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I’m the master of both
Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul
I’m gonna work it ’til your totally blown

No escaping when I start
Once I’m in I own your heart
There’s no way to ring the alarm
So hold on until it’s over

Adam Lambert - For your entertainment

Just tell me where the good guys are...

      I'l be running in the opposite direction

One day baby, maybe, I'll see what's good for me.

Today I remembered when we would play Batman and Catwoman on our street...things were simple...and having fun was so easy.

Since it seems everyone has a wishlist...here goes mine (even if it's just a reminder of things I'll buy for myself)

(No, I'm not thinking of buying the Eiffel Tower...however a trip there is in mind)

Hate the sin, love the sinner.

Mahatma Gandhi

Acknowledgement of the day:

You are nothing compared to the you inside my head...you're heartbreakingly worse...

Look at him
Look at me
That boy is bad
And honestly
He’s a wolf in disguise
But I can’t stop staring in those evil eyes

I asked my girlfriend if she’d seen you round before
She mumbled something while we got down on the floor baby

We might’ve fucked not really sure, don’t quite recall
But something tells me that I’ve seen him, yeah

That boy is a monster M-M-M-Monster
That boy is a monster M-M-M-Monster
That boy is a monster Er-er-er-er

He ate my heart
(I love that girl)
He ate my heart
(Wanna talk to her, she’s hot as hell)

He licked his lips
Said to me Girl you look good enough to eat
Put his arms around me
Said “Boy now get your paws right off me”

I acknowledge my addiction...

For some it's smoking, drinking, drugs, sex...it comes in many ways.

For me...what gives me that high, that special feeling, the extasy...the sudden smile on my face...

(I could be talking about someone in particular...that also does the trick and is SOOO much better, but let's be more general)

FLIRTING...I Need it! Of course this is the next best thing to actually dating, but that's a whole other story, a much more complicated one that can't be satisfied with a stranger blinking his eye at you!

...But no...it won't do if it's any random person...of course they have to appeal to me...a coke addict doesn't sniff flour...it gives no high!...So what I need is to have someone to flirt with. I may even not want anything more than that with him...but I need it!

Someone to try to impress, someone to make me blush, to make me laugh, to make me giggle inside. I need it and when there is no one around to do it, I get anxious, stressed, my spirit isn't as bubbly, I think to damn much about someone I would like to more than flirt...It basically sucks!

I need some flirting to be 100% sane...so please...for my mental health...where do all you so flirtable guys hang out???

the dreamers

How can I explain?

Talking to myself

Will I see again?

We are always running for the thrill of it thrill of it

Always pushing up the hill searching for the thrill of it

On and on and on we are calling out and out again

Never looking down I’m just in awe of what’s in front of me

Ohh now that's worth waking up at 6 in the morning!
I'm finally going to the gym again...after 4 years!! I squeezed into my schedule, well actually I cut sleeping hours...
Yesterday was my incial evaluation, taking measurements, weight, height, heart condition, flexibility...and I was surprised to hear that I was in great condition...and not so surprised to hear him ask me if I had ever done acrobatic gymnastics...yes...I am flexible, but it's innate...And he hasn't seen nothing yet ;)

Well it was a boost for my ego...and now I have to stick to the plan and wake up at indecent hours that drive me crazy..but hey, I guess it's worth it. If I'm ok now, I want to be great!

Right now I feel great about myself! I just sponsered a child from the Dominican Republic!

I recommend visiting the website...it's really simple, just 22$ per month and you'll be providing:

medical care, dental care, education, clothing and many other things. You will be in contact with the child, they send a handwritten welcome letter from your sponsored child (or a family member if your child is unable to write), a new letter from your child about every six months and an annual photo so you can see your child change and grow and many other updates.

So I'm really excited about this! Please checkout the site, even if just to be more informed and to recommend others to check it out!

www.children.org

I'm not about giving chances. Either you drive me Crazy and I WANT you…or nothing's gonna happen.
If it seams like i'm playing hard to get….then you should know, it's not a game and you're not getting me!

I perfectly remember being impatient to leave, but suddenly there was something new that made me curious and want to stay a while longer.

I NEED that reason again, I need to discover something new, in someone new.

GIVE me a reason.

P.S.- I'm in my high heels, my feet are killing me, so I'm getting a little impacient.

My weird desires....

When it comes to men, I just might be obsessivley picky. One little thing, that could just pass by unseen to someone else...I will pick it up, obsess over it and convince myself I can't tolerate it.

I already knew I like men with big, strong hands (lets add in good men nails...), but recently I recognized that, at least at first sight, small - almost the size of mine - hands are a real turnoff...

I just sincerly find it weird and unfair for those who have them like that, but I can't help it!

But hey, it's no deal breaker, just don't let me see them before you WoW me.

So would I be out of line if I said "I miss you"?

And then in the middle of nowhere I feel your scent...I stop what I'm doing and chase it until it fades away...it always fades..and I'm back to reality. I always break down a little when this happens, as if it's reminding me that you're Not there. It always takes me back and it's a menace to my mental health.

"Close enough to be your ghost..."

"Dum lado os bonzinhos
com muito cuidado
a dar beijinhos
com dia aprazado.

Do outro os malvados
a fazer amor
sem dias marcados
com frio ou calor.

Dum lado os bonzinhos
muito estudiosos
dizendo versinhos
em salões ranhosos.

Do outro os malvados
gritando na rua
que os braços estão dados
que a esperança está nua.

Dum lado os bonzinhos
metidos na cama
tomando chazinhos
molhando o pijama.

Do outro os malvados
os que dormem nus
sonhando acordados
com feixes de luz.

Dum lado os bonzinhos
batendo nos tectos
sempre que os vizinhos
são mais incorrectos.

Do outro os malvados
que fazem barulho
despreocupados
ao som do vasculho.

Devo ter por certo
os gostos trocados
detesto os bonzinhos
adoro os malvados."

-Ary dos Santos

The world is full of people whose notion of a satisfactory future is, in fact, a return to the idealized past.
- Robertson Davies

Oh, so true...

Wendy: I know you're not always perfect. I know you have tons of problems, defects, imperfections... but who doesn't? It's just that I prefer your problems. I'm in love with your imperfections. Your imperfections are just great!

Les poupées russes

Let Go

If you pick me a flower, I’ll wear it in my hair. I’ll stash little notes for you where you least expect them. I don’t have many firsts left.. but I’d like someone who I could offer all of my lasts. We’ll make history together. I’ll wait for you even if you’re late – and I won’t complain about it. Kindness to cashiers, valets, waiters and maddeningly slow postal clerks who would try the patience of Gandhi is a must. I will feel safe and most at peace in your arms. When you’re counting aloud, I will try and mess you up. I find you magically delicious. I will let you be right when it doesn’t really matter. I’ll giggle when you show off and I know it’s just for me. I’ll hold your coffee while you drive. I can build a fire without burning the house down. If you wash the car with me – I promise to wear a white t-shirt for you. I‘ll hide around corners and try to scare you in the middle of the night.. of course, I’ll end up scaring myself and you’ll have to calm me down. I can change a flat tire and my own oil. It’s the simple things you do that make me swoon the most. I love it when you sing to me. I’ll make you mickey mouse pancakes. Sleeping in has a whole new meaning now that we’re doing it together. I’ll cover you up and kiss your forehead when you fall asleep watching tv. I won’t swear around your family or make you wear silly sweaters at my family’s during Christmas. I’ll grant you three wishes. I’ll make you laugh. I’ll stare in wonder with you at that hot chick with the great rack. I will marvel at your strength. I’ll take care of you when you’re sick. I give a kick ass massage. I think it’s hot when you come home all dirty from playing or working hard. My heart will skip every time you walk through the door. My kisses will take your breath away – seriously. I’ll giggle if you leave your socks on in bed. My quirks and oddities have been deemed ‘adorable’ and I will love you more everyday for all of yours. I’ll hold you when you need it. I will give you space when you need it. I will let you be you. You’ll sleep better when I’m next to you. I’ll thank you every time you open a door for me. I’ll never give you shit in front of your friends. I won’t ever let you leave for work in the morning without your lunch and a passionate kiss. We can watch your movie first. I’ll clean the house perfectly every time your mom comes by. I like horror movies only when you’re with me and only as long as you hold me close. I don’t litter. I love when you pull me down to sit on your lap. I love it when you lay your head on my chest in bed. I can be ready (shower and all) in half an hour. I’ll look cute as hell in your shirt in the morning. I can balance a checkbook. I can never turn down a challenge. I’ll fit perfectly in your arms. I’ll understand if you get jealous – and do my best to show you that you have no reason. Hand-written love notes will get you laid every time. I can totally keep a secret. I’m pretty damn funny and will do anything to make you laugh. You will always look hot to me in the morning. I think it’s cute when you eat off my plate. When you’re sleeping, I’ll try to stay quiet. I’ll call when I say I will. Treat me like a woamn and I’ll treat you like a man. To clarify: I’m not looking for a savior, a fix-up project, or anything of that sort. I’m looking for a man who quite simply adds something extraordinary and special to my life. And I to him. A fair exchange, an amazing mind, body and soul connection and a place to build something magnificent.